We should probably start with the basics. What is an introvert? Are all introverts shy? Do they always avoid people with their faces stuck on their phones? Not always. Actually, some of us are not that easy to spot in the crowd.
There are tons of personality traits. Some are good (dependable, optimistic, humble) and some bad (lazy, arrogant, rude). Sometimes we incorrectly lump multiple personality traits together into one concept such as an extrovert. We tend to think of extroverts as always social, outgoing, talkative and funny. The reality is an introvert or an extrovert are each their own personality traits. What's the best way to define these traits? Think of them as batteries.
Extroverts are re-energized by the crowd. They're often drawn to groups of people like a moth to the flame. Introverts are re-energized by spending time alone. We tend to reach for a good book and head to a favorite nook. You can see what the tendency would be. Extroverts tend to have additional traits like social and talkative. Introverts tend to be quiet and shy. In my case, I have changed over time combining (at least for me) the best of both worlds. But there is a catch, especially if you're thinking about marrying an outgoing introvert.
What You Need to Know if You Fall in Love With an Outgoing Introvert
1. Social settings are fun for outgoing introverts, but exhausting.
We may be the life of the party for a time, but we can become drained fairly quickly. When we say we need to leave a social, we need to leave right away. There's no tank or gauge to tell us when exactly. Suddenly when we're out of gas we signal to you it's time to retreat.
2. In person we'll genuinely listen to you for hours.
We are fantastic listeners and we give complete undivided attention. We're very observant and in tune to how you feel. That may be a double edged sword so remember to be honest.
3. When we talk we like going deep.
Small talk is just not our thing. If we're going to talk then we start at the deep end of the pool. In conversation we skip slowly getting used to the water. "Tell me in one minute the three things we'll never agree on and go..."
4. We'll engage anybody. We'll find someway to connect.
We're sensitive to our environment. We want to make everyone feel welcome. We can build a connection with them at the drop of a hat. You'll be surprised at how much we'll know about a person in only a few minutes.
5. We hate talking on the phone.
We're convinced texting was invented just for us. Don't take it personally but we tend to screen our calls. Our minds are always engaged with something and that ringing tries to tear us away from our reverie. I literally groan each time the phone rings. Shouldn't that only be used in a real emergency?
6. We analyze everything.
Maybe it's more accurate to say we mull over everything. The official time for an accurate mulling is still hotly debated. So far it's been narrowed down to somewhere between ten days and two years.
7. We are great at figuring other people out.
Our social side may be outgoing, but the introvert side is always in observation mode. It makes us invaluable as a host for any occasion. We make sure everyone is covered and having a good time.
8. We might seem a little distant when we see you after a long day.
We spend a lot of time in our own heads contemplating the day or something years ago. It make a take a few before we refocus and ask about your day.
9. If we like you, we really like you.
In Turkey there are two words for friend: arkadas and dost. Arkadas can be anything from acquaintance to co-worker, but dost is someone you share all your real thoughts and feelings with. There's not too many on that list for me and you are at the top of the list.
Sounds simple enough. See you at the alter.